RIP

May heaven be filled with P.Y.T.s.

That's what a hamburger's.... all about

Date: June 14, 2008
Location: ?
Air temp: 70s
Water temp: ?
Hatches: ?
Fish landed: ?

Present members of the Fly Anglers Guild :|: Upper Midwest Chapter, for this outing were:

Booter
Xan


Normally, I would have said my Saturday morning was starting out poorly. For starters, I had just brought my car to the shop. I should have been alarmed by the ominous fissure that ran completely across their narrow parking lot, but for some reason that worry simply didn't stick. Booter was coming to get me, and fishing was in store. The sun was shining and good feelings enveloped me.

Fruiter arrived and I hopped into Old Blue. I checked my cell and had eight texts, mostly from other fishermen eager to join us. Despite the prospects of bad fishing in low, clear water and sunny skies, and having my car swallowed by a sinkhole, life felt good. I literally did not have a care in the world. I was going fishing with friends, and that is all that mattered.

Or so I thought.

As we drove up 35W through Bloomington, Booter had to make a quick stop in the area to pick something up for work. Running on an empty stomach, we decided to hit up one of the local fast food establishments. Curving around the highway offramp, we came across a McDonalds. Duly noted, but we would look for a few more options before deciding. Only moments later, all was decided, and this good day shot through the roof to stratospheric levels. Right behind the McDs stood... an In-N-Out Burger. A MOTHERFUCKING IN-N-OUT BURGER!

I sat there slack jawed like a mouth-breather for a few seconds, trying to process what I was seeing. It didn't look like any In-N-Out I had seen before, it looked like a converted IHoP, but the name was there, along with another large sign proclaiming $1 burgers. Joy rushed from my body to my brain and then back down to my lungs as I shouted, "THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER!"

And then I woke up... on Friday morning... dehydrated and exhausted from all the drinks the night before... still trapped in a land where paunchy yokels worship Culver's pap and overpriced juicy lucys.

Fucking A.

The Doctor Is In

While we wait for the MN early season to start, I have gone to California to check on the West Coast chapter of the Fly Angler's Guild. With everything in fine order, I present you this offshoot of the "Great Gas Station Names" series (click on the pic for a larger view).

P.Y.T.

I've come to a moral crossroad, and I don't know what to do. My search for new (to me) music has been taking me to some odd corners of the spectrum. For example, I recently purchased two Klezmer albums and three Devo offerings, and while they didn't do much for me, they aren't my cause for consternation.

I had somehow gotten a Michael Jackson song in my head. Not knowing the title, I went to iTunes to see if I could find it. Using the preview feature (which btw is waaaaay better than Amazon's), I was able to find the song, "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'" from the album, Thriller.

I purchased the song and it turned out to be a pretty good tune, but in my searching, I found another promising track. So I downloaded that as well and was rewarded with a bangin' tune!

I have never been a huge MJ fan, not owning any albums past Off the Wall. My memory of 80s pop culture is also spotty at best, but I couldn't for the life of me remember hearing this song. Certainly this song stands up with his best, and I felt practically cheated that DJs, club or wedding, have never busted out this track in favor of over-played hits like "Beat It" and "Billie Jean."

To give you a window into my head, when I hear a song, the first things I usually focus on are the melody, instrumentation and production. Lyrics come last. The song in question is "P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)".

After listening to and enjoying the song a few times, I hit rewind on my iPod to try and decipher the lyrics. Then, it struck me. In light of recent history, the title alone gave me cause for alarm (and made me start laughing on the bus). Images of a naked MJ crooning this song to Macaulay Culkin while cradling a chimp danced through my head. The actual lyrics didn't help, a portion of which I shall sample for you:

"Nothin' can stop this burnin'
Desire to be with you
Gotta get to you baby
Won't you come, it's emergency
Cool my fire yearnin'
Honey, come set me free
Don't you know now is the perfect time
We can dim the lights
Just to make it right
In the night
Hit the lovin' spot
I'll give you all I've got"

So here I am. Is it wrong for me to like this song, given the events and revelations of the past 15+ years? By actually paying money for this, am I also guilty of his (alleged) crimes?

In the end, I hope this will go towards the payment of his settlements to various lawsuits, and maybe everyone can get their lives back on track. I had hoped that writing this down would help me sort this out, but my feelings are still confused. I feel dirty.

And we're happy too

Yay!